WORDS: RADMILA BRKIĆ, Creator of the Facebook page and YouTube channel Radost zivota – The Joy of life; Owner of Nedodjija Belgijski Waffle – Pastry Shop
PHOTOS: MILOŠ NIKOLIĆ, DRAGON MEDIA
Translation: Kristina Nikolić
It seems to me that the only couple who did not have problems finding the right partner were Adam and Eve. From that moment on, the subject of the “right one” becomes more and more actual and today it is one of the most popular subjects among people. Magazines, books, the Internet are completely filled with advices on how to find the ideal partner and how to maintain the peace and harmony in the relationship.
All of us think and talk about how the “right one” looks like, how it is difficult to find him or her, how the time we live in is crazy, how the marriage lost its meaning, how all the moral values have died out, so this list of excuses for our unhappy love life turns into an endless one.
How is it that only a few awoken people understood that they will not find the answer outside themselves? How did they understand that the ideal partner does not exist nor will he show up with wind in his hair, like a prince on a white horse and unconditionally give himself to us until we become that “ideal partner” ourselves?
When you look at the mirror and at yourselves, but not your physical appearance, but little deeper, would you ask yourselves on a date? Are you “perfect”? Do you have all the characteristics you need in another person and do you match the description of the person you are looking for for so long?
With these thoughts you start your personal growth – comprehension of ourselves is our biggest challenge and most often the only obstacle towards the happy life we want. By revealing ourselves to us we gradually stop being miserable in our loneliness – the experience of being alone becomes fun and we start enjoying the cup of coffee with ourselves! A completely new dimension of conversing with ourselves in the mirror is suddenly opened!
Only then, when we step into the world with confidence and understand that we want true love but we do not need it to be happy, because we already feel the unconditional love for ourselves, only then, at that kind of vibration, will the ideal love for you show up.
When that happens you will simply know it, because the question “is this it” will not even exist – you will simply feel that it is the right thing. Our souls recognize each other and our reason becomes powerless, there is nothing it can do. You become covered with the flame of love which binds you into a whole, unites you and melts you into the figure of the Godly love. That love have already happened long time ago and it existed in the Universe, waiting for your time, the perfect moment of wholeness and maturity.
People also see and feel those couples. You will recognize them by the synergy which characterizes them, it is said that they can read each other’s minds, complete one another, say same sentences at the same time, they share interests, simply shine in the dark and radiate with positive energy. You feel fulfilled when you are next to them because they revive the belief in love and hope that there is somebody perfect for every one of us, but only when we ourselves become perfect.
With the existence of the love for ourselves everything we have learned until then and considered to be reality is no longer valid because we have found somebody with whom we do not look at each other and our insignificant flaws, but we look at the same direction and develop mutual understanding. This happens because our souls speak the same language, we only need to teach the “reason” and our ego to be silent and listen carefully.
And when you do listen carefully, you will hear that every one of us has their own language of love which is maybe different from ours. You are maybe speaking Chinese, so for you it is very important to receive gifts as tokens of love, while your partner speaks Italian and enjoys the feeling of your touch. And while you are persistent in talking Chinese and surprise your partner with new gadgets and gifts trying to express your love, your partner does not see that as your tokens of love but they continue asking you to talk to them in Italian. If this is missing, if you do not speak the same language of love, dissatisfaction and misunderstanding build up more and more. This is the moment where you might consider learning a few Italian lessons and learn that your partner sees the expressions of love as a hug, a little touch on their hand while passing by, a kiss. Then your relationship gets to a higher level and your connection is even stronger.
Since there is no a recipe for a happy life, there is no one for love, and for both we need to give a huge amount of effort and hard work. Keeping the flames burning while there is rain and strong wind is a real art! Making efforts about the relationship with your partner never stops, it is a constant growth and development, revealing new parts of your partner and yourselves.
Nobody can say that it is easy to maintain a relationship which became unbreakable, but when both of you are on that road completely and fully interested in your love, it becomes clear that the happy end is guaranteed!